I have a confession.
I consume an alarming amount of Bravo and true crime.
Not a healthy amount.
Not a “I’ll watch an episode before bed” amount.
The kind of amount where YouTube and Bravo probably think I’m unemployed.
If there were an Olympic event for switching between Housewives drama and murder trials, I would at least qualify for regionals.
My television habits make no sense unless you realize both genres are built around people making terrible decisions.
One minute I’m watching grown women argue over a seating chart in Orange County.
The next minute I’m analyzing courtroom testimony like I secretly attended law school.
Somehow my brain decided these are the only two acceptable forms of entertainment.
Let’s start with Bravo.
I watch almost all of it.
The better question is what I’m not watching.
Andy Cohen has gotten more of my weekly attention than some extended family members.
I know more about the Housewives’ marriages than I do some of my cousins’.
Unpopular opinion: I boycotted Atlanta after Kenya left.
I have my principles.
Are they logical? Not particularly.
But they’re mine.
My favorites remain Orange County and Beverly Hills.
And while we’re on Bravo opinions that may get me into trouble, I believe Tamra Judge is one of the greatest Housewives of all time.
There. I said it. Put it on my tombstone.
People love to criticize Tamra, but Housewives is a job.
Someone has to move the story forward.
Someone has to ask the uncomfortable question.
Someone has to walk into the room and immediately create chaos.
Tamra understands the assignment.
Remember the Season 9 reunion, when she screamed “That’s my opinion!” at Vicki Gunvalson and the internet turned it into a meme within the hour? That’s not an accident. That’s a professional at work.
She clocks in, stirs the pot, collects her paycheck, and clocks out.
That’s professionalism.
Would I want her interrogating me at brunch? Probably not.
Do I appreciate what she brings to television? Very much so.
But when I’m not watching women argue over who sat where at a charity dinner, I’m watching homicide trials.
And lately that obsession has one name: the Karen Read case.
Quick version, for anyone who has been living a peaceful, well adjusted life without me: Read was accused of hitting her boyfriend, Boston police officer John O’Keefe, with her SUV in Canton, Massachusetts. Her first trial in 2024 ended in a mistrial after the jury deadlocked. Her defense argued she was framed by an elaborate conspiracy involving law enforcement and people inside the Canton house where O’Keefe was last seen alive. In the June 2025 retrial, she was acquitted of second degree murder and manslaughter, though the jury did convict her of driving under the influence.
A hung jury, a conspiracy defense, and a partial acquittal. Of course I couldn’t quit this case.
I have tried to quit. I have failed.
Every time I think I’m caught up, another development appears and suddenly I’m three hours deep in legal analysis videos.
If someone asked me to serve on a jury right now, I’d have to disclose that YouTube has basically become my continuing legal education.
Emily D. Baker? Watching.
Lawyer You Know? Watching.
My YouTube recommendations now look like I’m studying for the bar exam.
The problem with consuming this much true crime is that it changes you.
I side eye everyone. Everyone.
I’ve developed what I call my armchair investigator lens.
Living in rural Wyoming probably doesn’t help. There are only so many neighbors to keep an eye on.
A neighbor leaves their garage open? Interesting.
Someone changes their story? Suspicious.
A husband says he’s running to the store at 9:00 p.m.?
Which store? How far away? Do we have receipts? Security footage? Cell phone data?
I’m just asking questions.
My poor husband didn’t stand a chance.
It started with Making a Murderer.
I innocently suggested we watch “just one episode.”
Seven hours later we were both convinced we could solve cold cases if someone would simply return our phone calls.
Now he’s the one sending me true crime podcast links.
So apparently we’ve become that couple.
Bravo and true crime may seem like an odd pairing. One is about wealthy women arguing at dinner parties. The other involves criminal investigations. But both require analyzing motives, questionable decisions, and people behaving badly.
Maybe that’s why I love them both.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to catch up on Housewives and check for updates in the Karen Read civil case.
Research is important.
I call it research.
At least that’s what I tell myself every time YouTube asks, “Are you still watching?”
Why yes. Yes, I am.
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